When We Hide
How do you act in your relationships?
Would you say there is a bitter impact on your relationships when you decide to hide from others?
Would you say there is a bitter impact on your relationships when you decide to hide from others? Perhaps you’re thinking, “What?, I don’t hide in my relationships. I’m social, involved, and active. I really enjoy others. And probably to a fault, I’m connected to tons of people.”
But pause for a moment and think again. How do you actually act in relationships? What extent do you openly share your true thoughts and feelings? Are you vulnerable? Can you relate to others as your real self? Without creating walls? Without hiding?
We all know from experience the feeling we get when others create walls to hide from us. How it affects us. Funny thing about walls, we think they’re safe places to hide until someone’s hiding from us.
Take another second and think about this too… How often do you take risks relationally? Would you say you are comfortable going to a deeper place emotionally? Can you express hurt? Ask for help? Are you okay with not necessarily getting what you want in a relationship?
Like the previous questions above, these will help you to determine if you tend to hide in your relationships.
The thing is, how we relate to others can lead to something bitter relationally. Something that causes hurt. Fracture. Misunderstanding.
This is nothing new. The first couple reveals so much about how hiding relationally distorts who we are.
When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees. Then the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” (Genesis 3:8-9, NLT).
Related to shame, what we looked at last week, hiding harms us and others. When we hide, we can easily blame others when things go wrong, we can bury our true selves, and we may settle for a life where we live daily in survival mode. How many times in a week does someone tell you they can’t wait for Friday?
Like Adam and Eve, when we hide from others, we exchange the person God created us to be for a distorted substitute who’s willing to conceal itself.
But, thankfully, God sees something different for us Something more than just surviving. Something that includes wholeness and being alive. He wants us to be men and women who thrive relationally. In freedom. Health. Vitality. Vulnerability. Risk. And authenticity. It’s the reason He asks Adam and Eve, “Where are you?”
Reflective Response: Return to the first question: Would you say there is a bitter impact on your relationships as a result of your decision to hide from others? If so, what is it? Name it out loud. Now, with your fists in a ball, extend your arms out to God. First, ask Him to forgive you. To take it. Now, release your hands, opening them up. As you do, ask God to help you to let go of whatever causes you to hide from others.
